Everything is held together by some sort of lynch pin, and most of the time the pin is the most obscure thing in your life. My lynch pin was Edmond. I had no idea what a big affect he had on me until one night I had a dream about him. It was like my subconcious was telling me to look in the right direction, I finally did. And I realized... Edmond is brilliant.Edmond loves the old things.
He appreciated them with the same vigor and devotion as I had. We spent hours together, talking about everything on the face of Renascentia. Including the fact that he had broken up with his most recent interest, and I hate to say it, but that was somewhat pleasing to me. I was not pleased that he was unhappy because of it, but... It was possible he no longer had feelings for her. It took me a while to figure out what I was going to do about how I felt about him. It was the first time in my life that I'd ever been under an intense influence such as this, and under no circumstances was I going to destroy the friendship with him that was so precious to me. Romantically or not, Edmond was a big chunk of my life. So I left it alone. I left it alone for a LONG while.
Every Ancient is sent into the field for a test battle against the Nameless. There are not many survivors on these trips, but 160 years old didn't seem all that bad of a time to die. Besides, Edmond was on my team. The whole group of Ancients was going into battle every day, but now I was playing a more active part. I knew what these things looked like, I knew that I may one day become one of them, but I was going to fight them. I was going to fight the idea of them until my very last breath, and Edmond was going to help me. The drop point was 100 yards from the edge of the grey zone, the wall where the monsters are hiding. I unholdstered my gunblade and let it shift into the sword mode. I held the blade in a perfect position and stared at the wall of swarming monsters, suddenly alerted to my presence. Edmond was at my side. I knew I wasn't supposed to, I knew the battle ethic and was aware that charging dead into the center of that legion was most likely going to get me killed... But as I looked into the eyes of those creatures, I saw something that I could possibly become. I hated them. And I hated myself for being like them. So I charged. I launched myself through the front line of defense and released a battle cry that was worth remembering. I ran in, but none of them touched me. All of the monsters moved out of my way, and I glared at them, demanding a reason for them to attack. But they didn't move. They looked at me with smiles on their wicked faces. I stood there, surrounded by the darkness and the demons and nothing was happening. It was all still.
"Don't fight us, Annabel." I heard a sweet voice call out to me. I whipped around, sword at the ready and my feet in a ready position. It was the same demon that I had seen behind the metal shop. "I've been waiting for you."
"Why?"
"You could have everything you want." She stepped forward and I was reminded of how beautiful she really was. Most of the other Nameless were not dressed in such elegant clothing or had such a perfect smile, but there she stood in all her dark glory, and she was offering me something that she knew I wanted. "Why do you deny yourself happiness, Annabel? You could be wonderful. You could have all the pleasures in the world. There are many men that would have you, dear. Don't you know?"
I was silent.
"Oh, come, come now." She laughed. "I know what it is you want. I know what it is you hide. Throw aside your ridiculous faith, come with me. I can show you everything." She promised me exactly what I wanted. She was tempting me with the chance to be like her, "free", from rules and restrictions.
But from the darkness I heard a voice. It was Edmond's. He was lost in the thickness of the dark too. He ran into the opening that I had somehow created in the midst of all these demons, and he stood by me. I couldn't see his demon -- the one who was telling him to let go of his dreams and his world -- but I could see him there. He was looking at me, and I was looking at him. Edmond and I walked out of the darkness together that day, his hand in mine, and neither of us looked back.
We went back to school, surviving something that most people didn't even fully understand. We now knew what the purpose of the Nameless was... They were a form of anti religion, almost. Converting whole towns and cities, this battle was not a physical one like most of us thought. You cannot kill the darkness with a gun. They are there to tempt you with what you feel like you want most. Edmond and I's relationship began to be closer than I had ever imagined getting to someone. I never, ever let my guard slide back up with him.
I woke up one morning, stared at the holographic clock and groaned. I had woken up an hour earlier than necessary. I inhaled the oxygen that was fed into my room through a small golden vent and allowed a small, vague smile to cross my lips. Then my eyes snapped open when I realized the reason for my early arousal.
The pain was gone.
I flung the sheets from my legs and stared at my inner thigh. The ashen color had disappeared entirely. I dared my fingers to touch the skin where the source of my anguish had once come. It was perfectly smooth. Edmond had renewed my faith. How could one person have helped with my heartache so much? I looked at the image in the mirror and was quite pleased to see that my mind was not playing tricks on me. The blotch was gone.
I donned a cute red top, a black over-jacket, and I reached in my closet for a bundle of jean pants. I stopped myself, and reached for the shorts instead. Today I was going to tell him how I felt about him.
I stared in the mirror and saluted myself "Good luck, soldier." And I was off.
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